What is Mediation?

Mediation is:

• a safe place to resolve your differences at your own pace
• an opportunity to recognise the needs of your children as well as yourselves
• a way of helping you to reach agreements which take account of all your needs, concerns and interests
• comprehensive – we can look at all issues together
• confidential, save for the sharing of financial information
• suitable not only for married couples but also if you co-habit, whether same sex under the new Civil Partnerships Act, or heterosexual, where the law is much less clear
• a process by which couples negotiate face to face about the arrangements for their future with the help of a neutral third party

Mediation is not:

• reconciliation - although it can help improve communication – contact our colleagues at Relate
• a substitute for legal advice – although the need for lawyers may be substantially reduced – for family law advice, contact  link  
• confined to family matters – we deal with neighbourhood and commercial disputes as well – contact  link

What usually happens in mediation?

“Mediation is an imperfect process whereby an imperfect third party aims to help  imperfect people reach an imperfect solution in an imperfect world”– Lenard Marlow

• Mediation is voluntary
• The mediators are impartial – although they may be advisors or more directive in their other roles as experienced family lawyers or CAFCASS reporters, when mediating they will not direct or express an opinion
• Although mediators will not give advice, we will provide substantial information and guidance
• Mediation is confidential, unless there are issues of Child Protection, Domestic Violence, or money laundering
• Financial information must be comprehensive; it can be shared with lawyers or with the Court at a later stage
• Sessions usually last 1 ½ hours and are 3-4 weeks apart, but the process is flexible and will be tailored to meet your needs

Other Documents

Your Assessment Meeting 

Agreement to Mediate

Memorandum of Understanding

How does it work?

 
Mediators who are members of The Family Mediators Association, such as ourselves, offer a range of methods and are skilled in assessing which type of mediation will work best for you.  They will discuss the different methods and agree with you a programme tailored to your needs.
Sessions usually last around 90 minutes.  The number of sessions depends on the complexity of your situation and the pace at which you need to go - the average is between three and six sessions.
Mediation usually takes place with you and your partner in the same room, with one or two mediators, usually depending on the complexity of the issues and relationship. Sometimes mediation can be “shuttled”, that is, you and your partner are in separate rooms and the mediators move between you. This is not ideal, but it can work where there is a real need for communication but there are good reasons for you not to meet face to face.
Domestic violence and abuse may often be a bar to mediation, but high conflict need not be. We have a great deal of experience of dealing with couples who feel very strongly about the rightness of their positions, but still want to try to find an agreed way forward. Mediation is not easy; after all, you are being asked to communicate and work together at a time when communication is probably at its worst.
You usually pay at the end of each session and the costs may be shared between you in any way you agree. You may get public funding (legal aid) to cover the cost of mediation.  Ask your mediator for information.

How to find a mediator

Both the Family Mediators Association and the National Family Mediation Helpline have directories of qualified mediators across the country.
You can look in Yellow Pages or local newspaper advertising.
Ask your solicitor, GP, counsellor or Relate for a referral
Refer yourself, by telephoning one of your local mediation services
ask the court for a list of mediators in your area
ask the Social Services Department at the council
ask at your local library

But be a wise consumer - always check the Mediator’s training and experience

© 2006 The Mediation Centre
Nowell Meller Solicitors
7/8 St. Mary’s Grove
Stafford
ST16 2AT
01785 273133
www.themediationcentre.co.uk
email tmc@nowellmeller.co.uk